It Starts
All my life I felt different. Not just different from other people but feeling feelings that differ from others. When something happens to anyone, familiar or not, I empathize with them, severely. I believe it is for that reason, I view the world as I do.
At the beginning of my life's spectrum, there is darkness. I was born into a world of wolves as a lamb with no shepherd. Before my first 30 days on the earth, I had suffered "loss" through the death of my "father". Even if I didn't intimately know him, his presence was surely missed in my life. There was more than just feeling like I'm alone in this world that wants only to hurt me. By the time I was 21 years old, I had experience far more pain in the realms of loss and disappointment. There was multiple car accidents, predatory family members, and abandonment which attracted the predators like a pheromone.
Me, Myself & I
I am the type of person that people don't want to be anymore. Caring & Kind hearted. Trusting & Loving. I give people the benefit of a doubt. Second & third chances. The shirt off my back. I'm that type of person. And evil people can't stand it. It shows that I am willing to make myself vulnerable. There's no need for me to pretend I'm something or someone I'm not. I am proud to be just as I'm supposed to be. ME.
To some, it shows their weaknesses. Others, it's their failures. It makes them angry to see that someone is actually happy with what they have. I refuse to be a assembly line human: selfish, self-contained, self-destructing, due to some innate feeling of inadequacies who mindlessly try to degrade others while succumbing to the constantly used motto: "I'm living my best life." Which also can be referred to as: "The faker I am, the better I seem than others."
Domestic Violence
Something that isn't fun to speak about is violence. Violence of any kind. Yes I am aware that society is filled with instances of violence and it has become desensitized in its nature. It is because everyone has become so wrapped up in themselves to give any much needed attention to violence against women, partners, and neighbors. The saddest part is that these types of crimes have always existed though they've barely been addressed and rarely are fully prosecuted.
I've been a "victim" of domestic violence more than once in my lifetime. I am no longer a victim. I am a Survivor. It wasn't easy by any means. I had to have help, support, and courage to continue to move forward with what was right by myself. I did not do it alone.
If you are in a dangerous situation or just want to learn more about the help that is available, please reach out to the agencies listed. There is someone ready to listen and help.